Sunday, February 10, 2013


I've come to realize in my time here on earth that most guys names Ryan tend to be SMOKING HOT. I can give you three examples off the top of my head (let's be honest, I daydream about these men on the reg): Ryan Reynolds, Ryan Gosling, and Ryan Lochte. All really, really hot.

If I had to kidnap anyone, it would probably be Ryan Reynolds. From what I can tell in all of his movies, he's pretty cool, and in The Proposal, he let's a woman boss him around, so that could work out nicely for us. The only thing better than kidnapping Ryan Reynolds, though, would be kidnapping Ryan Gosling. He's super hot not, but let's be real; he stole my heart back in The Notebook.

So, my plan is to kidnap Ryan Reynolds (RR). I'll make a ransom note to be found by his wife, Blake Lively, who is just as perfect in every way like RR, except I'm not a lesbian. Anyways Blake will get my ransom note declaring my kidnapping of RR, and I will gladly return him to her in exchange for "the other Ryan," who would be Ryan Gosling (RG). This way, I figure, I'll get to spend at least a week with RR while Blake tracks down RG (celebrities are very hard to track down, unless you're me. I easily kidnap them), and then when we make the switch I get plenty of time with RG until the authorities come looking for me. In my eyes, it's a win-win situation.

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